Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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