I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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