I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize