Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
there was a trapeze. enough said
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
