She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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