My hand turned me down
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
he's single and there are thong briefs.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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