The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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