so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
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the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
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I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
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