It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
