She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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