So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
how do flat chested girls get laid?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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