I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
