All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
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