No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i wish my penis had a tongue
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
