through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
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She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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