im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize