Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
