I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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