so explain again why im purple
no
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
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Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
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You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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