the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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