finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
