One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
