I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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