Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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