I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
