Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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