bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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