You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
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