And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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