Kiss
Puke
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
