brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
