You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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