we have officially lost it.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
