just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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