...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
