I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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