Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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