FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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