we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
