I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
So squirting runs in the family.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
