I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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