They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
