Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
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