I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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