Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
