The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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