My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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