All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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