Ambien. No doubt about it.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
