And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
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At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
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for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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