What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner