oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I would ride that face into the sunset
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize